Star Trek is full of memorable parents. In honour of the UN’s Global Day of Parents, I’d like to explore some of my favourites.
But before I get started, I want to thank my own parents. I was introduced to Star Trek by my dad. Next Generation reruns would come on at ten o’clock at night. If I had my pyjamas on and was ready for bed, sometimes I would be allowed to watch Star Trek with him.
I remember being excited to see Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country with my dad. Back then, being geeky was not popular. I hid my Trek passion for years. But I can still connect with my dad over Star Trek. My story isn’t unique. I’m sure many of you had a similar introduction. Thank your parents for their encouragement and love for your geeky passions.
Before I get started, I want to give a quick disclaimer. The characters I chose aren’t necessarily the best examples of parenting. The characters of Star Trek are flawed. Sometimes that is made more apparent by their parenting choices. But I think all my choices are memorable!
Chaotic Good Of Lwaxana Troi
Embrace the chaotic good of Lwaxana Troi, daughter of the Fifth House, holder of the… et cetera et cetera. The Betazoid Federation Ambassador was the mother of three children, the most well-known being Deanna Troi.
A constant source of embarrassment for the counsellor, Lwaxana was flamboyant and loud. She was preoccupied with Deanna’s love life or perceived lack thereof. But a fiercer and more loyal advocate, you could not find. In the episode “Dark Page”, Lwaxana Troi falls into a coma due to a reoccurrence of some hidden trauma. We learn how deeply the Betazoid loved her daughters and how deep the pain of loss hurt her.
Looking back, I didn’t like Lwaxana Troi. She was too unpredictable and made the stoic Captain Picard uneasy. She made me uneasy too. As a closeted gay teen, I wanted to keep my identity hidden and repressed.
I couldn’t share my feelings with anyone. Seeing her live and love so openly rubbed me the wrong way. But now I am sure she would be telling me to live my best life. She would hold my hand and we’d walk down Main Street in the Pride Parade. She would be a fierce ally and protector.
When mothers of LGBTQIA+ children are faced with adversaries, they can join our favourite Betazoid ambassador in saying, “I am Lwaxana Troi, daughter of the Fifth House, holder of the Sacred Chalice of Rixx, heir to the Holy Rings of Betazed. Who are you?” TNG: Haven
B’Elanna & Tom
B’Elanna Torres and Tom Paris, the Delta Quadrant’s favourite couple. Though we didn’t get to see any true examples of their parenting style, I expect the two of them had to make a lot of compromises.
The Chief Engineer and Helmsman both had their own complicated family histories. B’Elanna’s father left her and her mother at an early age. This caused her deep emotional pain and guilt as she blamed her Klingon heritage.
Tom Paris had a troubled relationship with his father. Admiral Paris was distant and held his son to high standards. As Voyager progressed, the two officers came to terms with their respective parents. In Lineage, Tom sincerely reassures B’Elanna that he would never leave her.
He hopes that they have several Klingon children just like her. “I am not your father. And you are not your mother. And our daughter is going to be perfect just the way she is.” Voyager: Lineage
In the Admiral Janeway alternate timeline, Torres, and Paris’ daughter Mi’Ral join Starfleet. She is fiercely loyal to the Admiral and willing to complete long and dangerous missions.
I am very sure they are proud of their daughter. This is at least partial proof that B’Elanna and Tom were good parents. Besides, Tom already had a brief experience parenting three hyper-evolved post-human children. Teenagers, Klingon or not, had to be a breeze in comparison.
Long Lost Mother
Our pale friend Data should never worry about his humanity. When an unknown and estranged woman who claims to be his mother, recounts how she and her then-husband left him alone on a planet and never returned, but are happy to have time with him now, his first reaction is, “I would like to corroborate your story before we proceed further.”
Of course, he does his research. His mother turns out to be an android like him, though she is unaware of this fact. She has all the memories and emotions that the original, human Juliana possessed. (I wonder if this technology was improved upon to make Picard’s transfer to the golem possible. In effect making Picard a child of Data.)
Like all mothers, Juliana wants to know about her son’s life and is very pleased to find out he has relations with a woman. In this case, she’s mistaken, but that doesn’t matter. It’s exciting to see Doctor Tainer interact with her son and relate “baby stories” and awkward growing pains.
When she places her hand on Data’s shoulder, you can feel the discomfort on his part. “Never mind, I don’t want to embarrass you… You didn’t seem to mind about being naked.” TNG: Inheritance (Just what every son wants, his mother recounting naked stories in front of his friends and co-workers.
When his mother is injured and her secret is discovered, a chip interface allows Data to interact with a holographic version of his father Doctor Noonian Soong. His father implores Data to allow Juliana to continue her life as a human.
Data chooses to honour that wish and give his mother the life he always wanted. When they part, you can see the real love Juliana Tainer has for Data. It really seems that Noonian perfected the Soong-type android. His love of his work is reflected in her and her love for Data.
Children Of Sarek
There is probably no parent more complicated and interesting than Sarek of Vulcan. He can only be surpassed by the variability and legacy of his children: Famed ambassador and Starfleet captain, Spock; adopted daughter and time travelling captain, Michael Burnham; and revolutionary mystic, Sybok.
The Vulcan father’s relationship with each of his children deserves their own novels. Each of his children desired his approval and love. All of them sought it as best they could. Whether it was his Vulcan heritage and culture, a personal choice, or some combination of the two, Sarek maintained a distance from his children. As many fathers mistakenly believe, he perhaps thought his children’s emotional health was better served by their mother.
But a father’s silence echoes loudly in a child’s mind. All his children chose a path that Sarek’s logic could not have anticipated. Successfully reuniting Vulcan and Romulus as a people. Saving sentient life from an out-of-control AI.
Sacrificing his life to keep a powerful alien entity imprisoned behind the Great Barrier. Surprise! I think in the end Sarek would have been proud of his children’s choices and the legacy of his name. Distant fathers seem to be a cross-species occurrence.
But I think Sarek wanted to reach out to his children as much as they wanted to reach him. “But secretly I admired [Spock], the proud core of him that would not yield.” TNG: Unification I
Parent-child relationships encapsulate the Vulcan philosophy, “infinite diversity in infinite combinations.”
Star Trek finds familiar places by exploring strange new worlds. Lwaxana Troi, Tom Paris and B’Elanna Torres, Juliana Tainer, Sarek. Each of these parents left a unique legacy for their offspring to build on. They made mistakes and learned from them.
Hopefully, we can learn from their mistakes and keep our parents and children close.
