Whether intentionally or not. The writers of Star Trek: Discovery have created a deeply loving LGBTQI+ family. They aren’t related but have chosen to be a family. You can see similar chosen families in Pose. But there is a fundamental difference. A true Star Trek difference.
In Pose, even though they love each other and look out for each other, they are always on the lookout for bigger and better opportunities, even if it comes at the cost of their family. In Star Trek, they all love each other, but the major difference is that if something bigger comes along, they leave with the love and support of the family. So who is in this family on Discovery and how does it compare to The Bear Family?
Who are The Bear Family you ask? It started with myself and my partner. In the LGBTQI+ Community, I would be considered a Bear. My partner would be considered a cub. We call each other Hubbie Bear & Hubbie Cub. From there, it has progressed to others we consider, family
You start with the loving couple at the head of the family. Hugh Culber & Paul Stamets. They love each other fiercely. They have even had major disagreements. But they have always managed to stay together. Seeing this is rare in the entertainment world. A gay couple who aren’t cheating on each other. They love and support one another.
In The Bear Family, you have Hubbie Bear and Hubbie Cub at the head of their family. Just like Hugh & Paul, The Hubbies love each other very much. Despite lockdown and mental health issues being thrown at them.
Stulber (Stamets & Culber) meet a young person, who is Non-Binary, Adira Tal. Adira has a partner, called Gray, that only they can see. Stubler doesn’t judge Adira. They don’t question Adira as to why they are Non-Binary or that only they can see Gray. Adira is accepted for who they are and whilst working with Stulber chose to become part of the family. They even raised the fact that the pronouns used, at first, were incorrect. Did Stulber make a fuss? Whine & moan? No. They accepted this as part of who Adira is.
Bear Bear and their partner Claire Bear have become part of the Hubbies family. Bear Bear identifies as Non- Binary. Do we judge them because of this? No, we learn what their experiences of life are and use that to enrich our understanding of the world. We try to use their preferred pronouns as much as possible. We don’t see it as a burden. We see it as part and parcel of who Bear Bear is.
There is the fun best friend, who becomes the fun Aunt, Sylvia Tilly. Having worked side by side with Paul they have become good friends. But when Paul is overtaken by the Mycelial Network, Tilly is by Hugh’s side. Supporting him. When Hugh is murdered and subsequently found in the Mycelial Network.
Tilly is there to support Paul. Tilly’s love of Science is infectious, especially the power of math. Tilly is also there to talk to those who are marginalised. She doesn’t care. Nobody should be alone.
Best Friend Bear is a lot like Tilly. Always there to support you and help out when you need it. Whilst Tilly is an Ally, Best Friend Bear is Pansexual and like Bear Bear is not judged by us. They were also part of the team that remains undefeated Star Trek Quiz champions. We met through a Star Trek Group on Facebook. Then we, and a couple of others met on what we termed as an Away Mission in which we went on a pilgrimage to Forbidden Planet. Best Friend Bear is not only an intelligent lady, but She also gives up her spare time to volunteer and train with St. John’s Ambulance.
Next, we have the Aunt and Uncle who are practical. In the Star Trek world, we have Aunt Michael Burnham and Uncle Saru. These are a pair of logical and practical relations. Together they have declared their relationship as brother and sister.
They love our family and stick by them. But they will always try and do this within the confines of their morals and Starfleet ethics. Sometimes they have had to stretch these, but always for a logical reason.
In the Bear Family. We have The Scots Bears. Mrs Scots is Bisexual and her Husband is Heterosexual. Though Mr Scots is comfortable in his own skin and sexuality he likes to blur the lines. I met Mr Scots through the Star Trek Facebook group. But a couple of months later, I met both him and Mrs Scots at London Film & Comic-Con. We hit it off. Mrs Scots and I went on to work together at ClexaCon. Both of Scot’s Bears are honest, almost to the level of the Zhat Vash. I always know where I stand with them.
Another close family member is Jett Reno. Her close ties with Stamets and Adira both at work and socially have drawn her into the family. Her sense of humour and a quick wit make her a lovable rogue. Even though Reno lost her wife in the past. We hope that in the near future she will be able to love again.
Our Baby Bear is at the beginning of a loving relationship. Baby Bear is again another member of the Star Trek Facebook Group. I have yet to meet him face to face. Though we may have crossed paths as he volunteers at LFCC. Both Hubbie Cub and I were hoping to join him in volunteering at Destination Star Trek. But this is now looking unlikely in the near future. Hopefully, we can meet Mikey Bear at the same time. We hear good things.
In conclusion, choosing your own family that accepts you for who you are can bring you so much stability.
No matter where they are and what their labels are. But this chosen family works both ways. They need you as much as you need them. They may not say it in so many ways. Look out for other signals and just letting them know that you are there can be just as helpful.
Article written by: Stephen Lester aka Tinkidium Rax.
10th host to the Rax symbiote. Other hosts have included. The Queen of Geeks. Undefeated Star Trek Quiz Champion. Star Trek: Online player. A Sims 4 Architect and now a plain and simple Lived Experience Consultant. This host currently uses He/Him pronouns, but won’t be upset with She/Her pronouns as this host is still adjusting to the Rax symbiote.
Facebook: Stephen.Leater72 Twitter is @Tinkidium2019
