I am a very happy nerd right now. I have just gotten to see the newly remastered Director’s Edition of Star Trek: The Motion Picture, and it is beautiful. It has transported me back in time to the very first time I saw this film.
The Human Adventure Is Only Beginning. . .
TMP: My Introduction to Star Trek
I will never forget the way I felt when I saw TMP for the very first time. I was absolutely swept up in the world of the starship Enterprise, and I never wanted to come back to earth and ordinary life.
I was eleven years old. I grew up without television or VCRs in the home. I had seen very few movies or television shows. Perhaps I was impressionable. But my first time watching TMP was unforgettable.
As was the case for every movie or show I ever saw during my childhood, I watched it in my grandmother’s living room. Now keep in mind, that renting a movie back in the 80s was an event. In the case of the small village where my Grandmother lived, the video rentals were in the same old country store with creaking wooden floors where you could get a handmade pizza made behind the counter, purchase a soft drink from the cooler, and side-eye the jar of pickled eggs on the counter.
This was long before streaming services or even DVDs. You rented your tape in its scratched plastic case and hoped that whoever had the tape before you had rewound it. And you didn’t care if you were getting the theatrical cut, the director’s cut, or any version, you were just so glad the tape was available to you.
I Meet the Enterprise Five
TMP was my very first introduction to the Enterprise Five. Settling in to watch wide-eyed, I met Kirk and Spock for the very first time. Cold, remote, mysterious Spock and arrogant, rude, and starstruck Captain Kirk left me cold; it was the gruff-voiced, tenderhearted, wildly bearded Doctor McCoy, who didn’t want his molecules scrambled, who won my heart.
From his irritated growl “They drafted me!” to his retort that “There are casualties. My wits! As in, Frightened out of!” to his characteristic grumble “You know engineers. They love to change things,” every one of McCoy’s lines had me laughing out loud with delight.
And speaking of engineers, warm-hearted, bright-eyed, rosy-cheeked Scotty had my heart from the moment he escorted Kirk to the ship. His laments about his engines and his devotion to his ship made him a much more approachable and lovable character than Kirk and Spock were.
But Uhura was my favourite. The way she plied her communications board like a concert pianist. The way she touched her earpiece when delivering messages. The husky music of her voice. It was evident to me that she had one of the most important jobs on the ship. And she was unflappable. I wanted to be Uhura when I grew up. I remember turning a coffee table into a “console” so I could play starship.
This Simple Feeling
I didn’t know I was supposed to find TMP “boring” or “motionless” or the special effects “cheesy”. I was enthralled by the excitement, from the wormhole ride to the mysterious Illia probe to the discovery of the old Earth NASA satellite that had become the mysterious V’Ger. But even as a child, my favourite moments were the tender moments. And the tender moment in TMP brought tears to my eleven-year-old eyes.
That moment. Spock, lying on the diagnostic bed in his spacesuit, Kirk bending over him. Spock, who has been so distant and so removed, has had the experience of a lifetime, and he is processing his epiphany. Just as anyone would do, he reaches out to touch the arm of his closest friend.
Kirk takes that hand in both of his. That most basic of human connection, the expression of affection and concern, that purely platonic intimacy, made a tremendous impression on my young heart. I was raised in a culture that did not sexualize open displays of affection and friendship between men, and I thought nothing of it except that it was my favourite moment of the whole movie.
It still is.
I didn’t really understand what was happening when Decker and Ilia transcended, but I knew I loved Captain Kirk giving the order to go out “thataway.”
Coming Home to Star Trek
Fast forward twenty-five years. I’m no longer a starry-eyed impressionable eleven-year-old with limited access to media; I’m a grown woman who has seen her share of films and television.
I had drifted away from Star Trek when I graduated high school and had only recently come back to fandom the same way I had come in the first place: through the novels. I came back to Star Trek with trepidation: surely something I had loved so much as a child could not possibly hold up? Surely some magic would be gone.
What I learned was that Star Trek was even more wonderful to me as a grown woman with some bitter experiences. I needed the idealism and hope of Trek as an adult more than ever. And I could articulate now what it is that I love so much about TMP.
Time For Awe and Wonder
I love the slow and stately pace of the film. There is time to stare in awe and wonder. There is time for reflection on the wonders of the universe, the beauty of a starship, and the simple feeling of friendship. There is time for introspection. There is time to joke, even in a crisis.
Like Kirk and Spock and McCoy and all the rest of the reunited crew, I have grown and changed from that wide-eyed girl. But TMP reminds us that the best parts of Star Trek and the best parts of ourselves have not changed.
Besides the newly remastered version brings it all together for me: the wonder and awe of the young nerd girl discovering Star Trek for the first time, and the wonder and awe of the adult woman nerd coming back to find Trek more relevant, more meaningful, more essential, than ever.
Star Trek: The Motion Picture: Director’s Edition is streaming on Paramount+ NOW!
